Would it be great to achieve all the dreams and goals what you have in your life?
Have you ever wondered why haven’t you already done those things? What prevent you?
I noticed at some point of my life that my thoughts were if and because – life. I talked about issues, ”That would be nice if …” Or, ” I can’t because….”, ”This is how it is, because…”
I realized that I wasn’t happy with myself or my life. I began to think what can I do? What kind of things do I need to change? What do I want from life?
I realized the only thing I can change is me! It matters how I think about things, how I react. What kind of, actually plan do I have in my life? How hard I’m willing to work, to achieve my goals. Excuses is a way to say that the goal is not important or motivating enough for me, yet.
It’s easy to transfer responsibility for your own happiness to others. Then you can be lulled into the idea, because the others do not work in a particular way, my goals and desires can not be happen. THINK! Do you really want to give keys to your happiness in someone else’s hands, YOUR happiness? Think what YOU really want.
For me clear instructions to change my life gave NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming). I had been reading on this subject in the past part of my studies, and I had made some excursuses also. However, I just had not got my life fully that way I wanted, as I would have liked. About six months ago I decided that now is the time, I need to do something. I went to study NLP more, so I am able to help others also in the future.
I learned a lot about myself. I am not perfect, and I never will be, but I’m great just the way I am. I can accept and respect myself and others more easily. Sometimes I catch myself thinking at the old ways, but now I recognize these situations better than before. And because I recognize disturbing behavior / thoughts in me, I am able to change it too. In a minute and you can do it also:) The human brains are full with resourses that we are not using enough.
So what do I mean?
I do no longer want to go dancing because there are only drunk people/pro dancers / bad dancers (what ever there will be)
I can’t learn math/ percentage decline / foreign languages _________ (put here what ever you can’t do) because I do not have the math skills/ language skills or what ever you don’t have
I don’t want to go dancing because I’m too old/ fat /small/ smiling________ (choose adjective you want), and I do not ever get asked to dance
I can’t learn to dance, because I have two left feet, and I also am so clumsy
This is the one and only correct way to do it, and only by doing so, you will become a good / respected / skilled….
What is common all these phrases above have?
All the sentences is full of ”truths”, things or beliefs that we hold as true. Are they completely true? NO, they are only OUR beliefs about these things.
Pick one sentence, at the time, and challenge your own beliefs:
- Is this absolutely 100% true, ALWAYS? Could it be that sometimes you can do math, sometimes I get to dance, sometimes there’s dances sober / worse / better dancers, Do you hurt yourself every time you try to move? Challenge your own thoughts.
- When you were reading those sentences and challenge those, there was probably few things you heard in your mind eg. Well yes, sometimes I get to dance, but usually I do not, and then explanation why this is so. Or Well I’ve now been able to calculate something, BUT already in school it has been proven that I really can’t. Or what was your thought and response to that. Do not worry this is perfectly normal, That is the way we humans operate in. Because we have some beliefs , we want those to be right, we want to believe in it. People wants to protect their own beliefs, this also provides feeling of security. And because we want to secure this belief that we have, we seek the evidence, something which confirms this is way it is. This is normal, this is how we operate. Is it then possible to change those beliefs? Of course!
- The first time you’re wondering whether this belief is true, ALWAYS, EVERY TIME, you gave your mind an opportunity to change your beliefs. I wasn’t saying that you were wrong, but you may have been use to look at things only from one direction. You may have learned this idea / way to think at some point in your life.
- Think had this idea/beliefs help you, does this bring happiness and good feelings in your life?
- Remember all of these beliefs have a good purpose. It can protect us from something. This learned way of thinking / action has been at some point in our life have been useful and necessary. When we realize that this idea / belief do not longer serves us, it does not take us towards what we want, it has come time to change it.
- Start to questioning your thoughts and beliefs that no longer serve us, doubt it, then you can choose yourself new better the way of thinking that will serve you better and will take you to where ever you want your life to go.